The other day, I read a post that was extremely triggering that came from a surprising source. Now, mind you, this post was not negative at all and there was much I appreciated about it. For example, one of my favorite quotes:
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I also agree about how the arts bring us life. This is one of the greatest reasons I write is because it brings me life, it ignites the ever-burning spark within me, and helps me shine the light within my heart. It’s also why I affirm my daughters and their creativity whenever they make me something even if it’s a scrappy stick figure on a page with crooked words full of typos I can’t even read.
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However, the art of creating a book is wholly different than any other type of art. And not simply due to the impact on the author but also due to the requirement of the receiver of this particular form of art. I will DIE on this sword!
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And here is why:
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1. Visual Value: Hand-crafting doesn’t have to be professionalized at all to be considered *valuable*, especially not in the evangelical mommy circles. This is not a mere reflection on my religious background. I have discovered how the “sensory” art of this world is valued and prized more than the art of words. People love the visual. I don’t blame them. It’s why one twenty-second video on TikTok can go viral. Or something as simple as a humorous porch display (Frank the Gargoyle). This is why publishers use book trailers and covers and authors promote through artsy aesthetics to gain a platform.
1A. Sadly, I spent my whole life being castigated because I couldn’t measure up to the crafting skill of others. I’ve experienced this within my family and from evangelical mommy circles. My craft was never pretty enough, never perfect enough, never worthy enough. My fingers could never seem to sew the right stitch or sketch the right shade or play the right note. My ADHD mind couldn’t slow down enough to follow the precise pattern. And when you practice, they say it makes perfect but it never truly does…I still love those who can handcraft, but some people simply aren’t gifted at hands-on creation. And I sigh, wishing on some days that I could crochet a washcloth with the same passion and ease as I write a 120,000-word book. Because people are more drawn to the sensory and the visual.
2. Instant Gratification: In our society of instant gratification where we use credit cards, we watch 30-second TikTok videos, we read short and fulfilling blog posts, and Twitter posts limited to 120 characters, the art of writing and the act of receiving writing is not an instant gratification process. It is far simpler to gain an audience who can instantly receive a handcrafted item, watch a music video, observe a piece of art, view a dance, etc. Even watching a film or binge-watching a tv show or playing video game heralds to the visual value of art. It doesn’t mean there isn’t purpose or value in all of these art forms. It simply means it doesn’t require as much time or vulnerability.
3. Author Vulnerability: Writing comes from my heart and my mind, bleeding my soul on paper through my writing. By no means is this is a post to negate the vulnerability of other art forms. It simply raises awareness to the real and certain risk and soul-sucking work of the art of wordsmithing: to craft a whole world of one’s own imagination, characters with their individual histories/dreams/personalities/battles, well-worked plot, twists and turns, suspense, humor, action, themes, and most importantly: a voice. It’s that inner voice that we struggle with. For an LGBTQ+ author and an #ownvoices work, it’s especially a process of battling the inner demons, of reclaiming the trauma of a past, of crafting words that have become gold as glitter and starlight, of soul light, and the dreams born of neutron stars that never seem to hold as much value as something you can touch and hold. No wonder you hear of the anxiety of the author, our existential crises, our prone to depressive episodes, imposter syndrome, inauthenticity battles, etc. And this is just the crafting side. Imagine the additional pressure of researching agents and editors and contests and pitch festivals, of the querying process and rejections etc. This is an emotional roller coaster! It requires an extreme level of vulnerability and strength as an author’s success does depend on whether people appreciate their work.
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Honestly, I am a huge fan of the song Iris with the Breaking Benjamin cover with Diamante as my favorite rendition as a little glimpse of the inner battle of an author. It’s why authors depend upon music so much because certain music brings us that instant gratification feeling to feed that spark in our souls. Yes, I am getting my emo side on.
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And you can’t fight the tears that ain’t coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know, you’re alive
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know, you’re alive
And I don’t want the world to see me
‘Cause I don’t think that they’d understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
‘Cause I don’t think that they’d understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
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Unlike with any other art out there, the world of books also requires vulnerability on the part of the reader!
4. Reader Vulnerability: It requires so much more vulnerability to be a reader, especially a reader of fiction! Unlike with self-help books or non-fiction where you have a far more detailed and concise expectation of what you want to and will receive as an individual, the realm of fiction requires far more risk and vulnerability. As a fiction author, I am petitioning you, inviting you, downright begging you to be vulnerable, too! I open my hand to you. I invite you to be strong. I invite you to cry, to laugh, and most importantly: to INVEST! And I don’t mean monetarily, but we will get to that.
5. Investment: The act of reading a whole BOOK requires far more investment than any other form of art. It requires time. It requires the willingness to be vulnerable and to open your heart to take a journey. Unlike with clothing or paintings or sculptures or film or dance or music which awakens your visual or auditory or audio/visual senses combined, reading requires more time and attention. It’s a portal opening into the vast reaches of your mind. Most of all, it’s a doorway to your heart. It requires a time, hard work, and a spirit of ADVENTURE!
5A. Remember, you do not take this adventure alone. We went on this adventure first. We blazed the trail for us, yes…but also for you. Most of the time, it was forged through spirit and strength and tears and blood and sweat. Sometimes there is healing and life. But there is also darkness and lament. We spiral high and we spiral low. We are made up of infinite identities. We are filled with angels and monsters, enemies and lovers, dragon’s blood and phoenix fire, chaos and dreams. We wear the skin of the universe. We bear the gravitational force of black holes in our hearts. The only way out is to go in…and we shed stardust onto paper. We don’t just create. We fucking become! So, we invite you to leave your world behind, to free your soul to unravel the framework of reality, to fall in love with fantasy, to deepen your mind into a dream…become!
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As a good author friend of mine put it:
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Caught in the gravity of pages turned…
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And YES! We do deserve to be paid for our creation after a lifetime of honing the craft and pouring blood and sweat and tears into our work for sometimes years! I don’t write for fun. But I do turn around and invite you to read my work for a mere 99 cents or sometimes…nothing.
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While a wool hat may be worn or a piece of art may be put on the individual’s wall who is satisfied with that, an author’s work formed of their very lifeforce and soul’s energy is meant to be READ! And if they are sharing with you, it means they trust you enough to share that journey!
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So, the next time an author invites you to read the book they have penned, regardless of whether or not it is published, remember all these words. And maybe be willing to muster up the courage and say, along with Bilbo:
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“I’M GOING ON AN ADVENTURE!”
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Special thanks to those who have journeyed into my adventure…
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Writing is a calling. Writing is a quest. Writing is life!
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So, pick up your spiritual swords and join me in my quest…and LIVE!